time's moving towards something. right?

"and [she] was left alone. Some distinction that set [her] apart. Possibly [she] was simply odd. A personality that would not fit in. Waiting to find that one who felt the same way about things. Ways [she] wasn't even sure [she] could articulate but that that [she] would not need to. With the right one." - Jeffrey Lent In the Fall


melancholy.

ELIAS FUND
they finally agreed to do it
tower hill is gunna raise money for ELIAS FUND
i've been trying to get mr. newlin and mr. baetjr's attention with this since 7th grade.... and now i'm in charge of helping run this big project

i'm so proud of the founders of the fund... they're only in college and at first, when i met them, i thought they'd get nothing accomplished because they seemed SOOOO disorganized

here's what they've done so far:

a) found elias
b) payed for secondary schooling for his three sons *Honest and Manuel*
c) payed for a student JUSTICE to go to college to study finance
d) formed a youth soccer team
e) adopted a community of 300 people who's adults are blind and the kids have to beg for money to get food... now the fund is sending the kids to school and supplying the families with their monthly food rations
f) at the moment their in Zimbabwe again writing out plans for the community center they plan to build

all with the money of dispatch lovers who want to see the force do something good.... #### yea....

... its the life i learned to lead and i grew confident ...

back from delaneys
long way for a short trip
but i'm glad i got to see her and support her
i finally met Matt, what an outstanding actor... but he has some REAL self esteem issues.

So her boarding school's facilities are amazing
2 ice hockey rinks
a brand new fitness center with squash, a huge pool, etc.

the courses the can take
3 different philosophy courses
a good 2 dozen science electives including Ferensics and Neurology!!
German and Chineese.
holy ####

they have so many internationals
kids from the DR, Afghanistan, Ghana, China, Singapore, Korea, Japan, the Bahamas, Jamaica, France, Canada etc.
almost 20% of the school is like that
what diversity towerhill lacks

i had some good conversations with mr. and mrs. osborn about what towerhill lacks
he's on the board so he knows there are a lot of problems with tower hill socially
we're lacking something
he told me they're thinking of expanding the school to 70-90 kids a grade in highschool but mr. b doesnt like the idea and they don't know where to get more kids.... he even said they've suggested having some boarders....
there's something wrong with our school
unfortunatly i have to deal with it
senior year i wont cry cause i'm leaving, i'll cry cause i graduated at a place i hate.

i think there will be a great amount of change that will hopefully affect and benefit the younger generations with our new headmaster, our new facilities being built for sports, etc. I'm hoping that the lights on the turf field will spark school spirit for night games that i never got to experience

delaney's school has such spirit
they're whole school was covered with blue grafiti and Hotchkiss Rules because it was Taft Day, which is a day where their sports teams have all games with Taft their rival school, the Rhinos
it was soo cool to see all the kids come back wearing the teeshirts with their faces painted blue

i wish i felt that way about my school
i just detest it
its not that i detest the school persay
the faculty, the staff, the facilities, the courses are great(although i'd love to see more courses offered!!)
i think its the kids that really make a school
we dont have that

i wish i could have school spirit
it's been too long with out it, i've already developed an anti-THS spirit and now they're trying to introduce it to us with pep-rallies and i'm not buying in
i hope that the younger kids can grasp this

the school year is now officially a quarter of the way through
time's a peculiar thing
each day each month drags on
but now i'm surprised its come and gone
i wish i had a remote control
things need to pick up the pace
i wanna get out of here
go somewhere new
somewhere different

i'm so accomplished
LIT apps
School apps


i feel like barstead and greig are trying to ignore me
they never write and barstead always acts so distanced
maybe he agrees with the rule about us being in touch
or is afraid of it
or doesnt like me? i'm such a pest

i feel like this great annoyance
like i'm inferior to everyone else
like i'm not actually liked
people want to get rid of me
a gnat at their ear
i like people more than they like me (the worst)

if only i knew what they were thinking
the great mysteries of the world
if only i knew how they truly felt
if only people werent so nice to my face if that isnt how they feel





Crew Starts Soon
change?

there is something speacial about us as a group
that we are content
to sit... or walk... or talk for hours
just being with one another is enough
its never awkward
we just pick up from where we left off

its like a core... all of us together...
i love them all to death

this weekend in philidelphia was amazing
the reunion was perfect
just the right people
me, katie, kate, taylor, sage, maddie, max, kyle, phil, nick and matt... perfection
i love those boys
we ran after their train as it left and we were about to cry....


things like that are just perfect